The Empty Nest

So, here I am.  A 48 year old mother of two college students.  Can someone say, "Empty Nest"?  This past year I moved my daughter into her first apartment, moved my son to his first dorm room, packed up our house of 13 years and moved to a much smaller home, and started a new job in a new program in a new town.  It has been the year of NEW for the Chaney family.  In all this, you can imagine there was a little bit of stress involved.  Thank goodness I am surrounded by caring and loving people who listened to me vent and provided that shoulder to lean on.

Since I am now an empty nester hanging with my bestie boy (husband) in a WONDERFUL old neighborhood, I get to do some really neat things: walk to restaurants, explore hidden parks, renew my interest in running and biking, read all those books I planned to get to 'someday', volunteer more, go on epic motorcycle rides, and do all those activities I wanted to do before but couldn't because I was "MOMMY!"  I am still a mom, but my children are more self-sufficient now and enjoy their independence (most of the time) so now I am also "Kelly" - something I haven't really had the freedom to be for 23 years.

I have friends who are worried about their impending "Empty Nest" time.  They fear there will be nothing to do when they are 'couple' and not full time parents.  This was a fear I had too.  I am married to my best friend and we enjoy the company of each other, but I knew I would get tired of him if we were together nonstop - that happens even with best friends.  It took honest conversation for us both to understand there would have to be times when we did things on our own or with others in order for us to continue to be interesting people to each other.  My bestie boy loves sports and will attend sports events or listen to sports or watch sports on TV without me and that is fine.  I love shopping and pageants and bestie boy is more than happy to let me do these activities without him.  When we are together, we have things to talk about that we did on our own.  I don't really care about the games he saw, but I love hearing how excited he gets talking about them and the emotion he puts forth describing that perfect (or terrible) play.  He listens to me talk about my girlie stuff and is supportive of what I want to do in pageant world.  It is a great situation for us both.

My suggestion is - DO NOT BE AFRAID OF THE EMPTY NEST!  Use this time as a way to reconnect with your partner AND also as a time to reconnect with yourself.  All those things you wanted to do but never had the time, take the time now.  Be with your partner some and be by yourself some and watch how your relationship becomes even richer.

Me and My Bestie Boy Enjoying One of HIS Activities